
Readers, this may be the most honest thing ever posted on The Apron Stage. Ready yourselves.
This is live from Guatemala City. Tomorrow morning, we will get in a rental car and drive up to the Guatemalan Highlands where we will stay at a hotel in Salama that boasts hot water on the upper floors. The day after that, we’re heading farther up the Polochic valley. We’ll stay in Senahux, a Q’echi village where women still cook over open fires.
It’s a nine-hour drive, on roads so battered and cut up that the last time we tried it, within five minutes the car seat had been yanked from under the seatbelt and turned upside down.
When I got home I posted pictures of me learning how to make tortillas, of me in front of a wall of Mayan weavings. I knew, instinctively, that these are cool things to like. I talked about them superiorally in social settings and I’m confident it all sounded fantastic.
But here’s the truth: I have spent the last two weeks begging Levi to let us go to Salt Lake or Florida instead of coming to Guatemala.
A side story: Last time, on the drive up, I was stressed out about the baby-unable-to-sit-in-a-carseat situation. “What,” I demanded, “made you say that this was a safe or smart place to bring our baby?” We were listening to a mix CD created by a good friend, and in the middle of our fight, it assumed the role of perfect and most accurate soundtrack. “I lied about being,” sang the Lemonheads, “the outdoor type.”
There you have it. I don’t like adventure. I don’t like traveling unless it’s to London or Paris. I don’t understand vegetarians or healthy people. And the real reason I haven’t joined Facebook is because I’m simultaneously aware of what is cool to write in a profile and how I’m not, in truth, any of those things.
Some confessions.
My favorite book is Gone with the Wind. I’d like to say something written by Nabokov. Or Joyce. But I’m a total sucker for Gone with the Wind and this is probably because of how well Margaret Mitchell writes about kissing.
I’ve only been skiing twice. Whenever someone hears that I grew up in Colorado and went to school in Utah they say, “You must be a big skier?” One might think. Both times I got cold.
I don’t like foreign films. I think they’re slow and who has patience for subtitles? I would rather, much rather, see You’ve Got Mail for the sixtieth time.
Little hole-in-the wall/out-of-the-way restaurants scare me. I have no interest in the “really good” local food that “no one knows about.” I love Big Macs. And on our honeymoon I asked Levi if we could go to Taco Bell. Also, street food is skeezy.
My very favorite exhibit at the Met was the one about supermodels. I could look at pictures of beautiful people all day. While I’ve had some really wonderful moments in front of modern art, truth be told: I don’t understand that either.
On my very last day in New York City I wanted to stay home. The apartment was empty—excepting an air mattress. Fortunately, I married well and Levi insisted that we get out. We can have staring contests anywhere, he said.
I have nothing to prove that I love the outdoors. This one I want to love, and theoretically I do. But mountain biking, rafting, rock climbing, fishing? Wouldn’t it be easier to just go on a walk?
I use our expensive camera like a point and shoot. My mother-in-law is a professional photographer willing to teach me a few things. I even tried to read a book about photography once. Still, I don’t know how to turn off the flash.
I subscribe to The New Yorker but never seem to find time to read it. We’re talking an average of one article per three issues. And have a conversation with me? I’ll find a way to reference that one article.
So there you have it. Do with me what you want. I get it.





41 comments
Comments feed for this article
February 9, 2010 at 12:30 am
angie f
It is both empowering and very terrifying to let our inner uncoolness out.
To fuel the sharing:
I dread it when “fun moms” call and want to include my children in some exhausting activity (like taking a 2 yr old roller skating). I am not a fun mom. Most days, I’d rather stay home.
I cannot remember the last veggie I successfully got my son to eat. I’m feeling good if he isn’t consuming a “meal” entirely made of crackers. He’s very picky and some battles I don’t have the energy to fight.
I’m an attorney and I HATE the courtroom. Nothing is worse to me than standing before a judge.
I did not like Catcher in the Rye when I read it. I wanted to throw it across the room or burn it.
I too have not managed to successfully use my expensive camera as much more than a point and shoot. I can turn off the flash. That’s all I can do and that’s AFTER an entire workshop.
And on the subject of your new adventure, one of my friends is in a FSO marriage and before she followed this husband to law school in Provo, the furthest she had been away from Vegas was Panaca NV (look it up, neither London nor Paris). She has been deeply ambivalent about the whole FS thing, but she’s doing okay. Let me know if you want me to hook you up with her.
February 9, 2010 at 12:51 am
Chantal
I love Gone With the Wind too!! I must admit, I do love the outdoors, traveling to third world countries, and foreign films (if and when I get around to watching a movie). I’ve always found that I am weird for enjoying these things. Most of the time, a huge part of me wishes I were more normal. For example:
I don’t watch TV except for when I am sad.
I am only a social movie watcher. I don’t quote movies. I could never tell you which movies are currently in the movie theater.
I am uber-nerdy, but not smart. I adore nerdy things, science museums, and smart people.
I am clueless when it comes to all things pop culture.
I love to travel, but have no sense of direction.
I hate board games; I prefer conversation or active activities.
I cannot stand watching sports.
I am not a foodie. I don’t cook, snack, or care about what I eat.
Most people I’ve ever met, watch lots of TV, watch lots of movies, don’t care to travel, don’t want to have deep discussions, and love food.
As for facebook, I would hope that you would be friending your friends…who probably love you just the way you are…so you could post things that reflect the honest you, and still be loved for it.
February 9, 2010 at 1:35 am
Sarie
Ooooooooh Rebecca. You wish. I don’t buy it because I know you. And you’re the most intellectual person around. The best writer, the most educated, the most driven, the most analytical (and you can use the big words, not the small ones), the funniest, the most complimentary.
I just don’t buy it.
But I liked thinking for a few moments that you were normal for once. Makes me feel better about myself.
February 9, 2010 at 2:46 am
SASmylie
When I read a book or see a movie I do not want to have to figure out the true meaning…I just want to enjoy it and feel emotion at the end, I’m not wanting happy endings every time though. I love to ‘people watch’ and love the idea that there are so many scenarios to this life. I enjoy TV and get caught up in reality shows (not all, I am selective in that area).
But I love FaceBook! My daughters have to set it up and give me training sessions. And I am still figuring out there are different pages or walls ..you guys know what I mean. The thing I love about it is that I can keep in touch easily, and at anytime i want, with people I love and that I have known but are not in close reach. I have had contact with people that i have not seen or heard of in years but think about oftern with warmth. AND DON”T get me started on Skype!!!!!!!
February 9, 2010 at 7:30 am
JourneyBeyondSurvival
You think nobody else edits? I do.
It’s okay if you don’t like it. It’s fine if you’re FREAKING OUT right now. You will rise above in a few days or months or weeks. Levi will cope. Adelaide will be in oblivious heaven. All the new and strange will ease their way into a semblance of normal.
If you weren’t questioning and dragging your feet, you wouldn’t be normal or cool. Strangely, this makes me miss adventure more than ever.
February 9, 2010 at 8:22 am
nakiru
I once wrote a whole blog post on how we edit ourselves for public display on the internet. Then I kept it private because it revealed too much about who I really am, and the difference between what my facebook status reads and what I’m actually doing.
My favorite books are intellectual novels, but secretly I wish I wasn’t so full of myself so that I could read a trashy chick lit novel on an airplane without feeling ashamed of my taste.
I love cooking, but only when I’m not exhausted after a day of work. So…never, really.
I love McDonalds’ chicken nuggets. I tell people it’s because they remind me of my childhood, but let’s be honest. We never got the chicken nuggets when I was a kid, we each got a hamburger and shared a fry and drink. I just like the taste of (badly) processed chicken drowned in sweet and sour sauce.
As for you, your honesty was both touching and hilarious. Go you.
February 9, 2010 at 9:57 am
lisapiorczynski
I love this post. And I love you even more for being finished with it on Tuesday so I could have an extension. You rock, Bex.
February 9, 2010 at 10:19 am
Evelyn
Much of what you said rings true in my book too! When we moved to Kazakhstan and my husband wanted to just leave our carrier/car seat at home, I was so mad at him… but by our second day in the city the car seat was basically retired (we eventually took it apart to use the straps for a borrowed high chair!). I was also wary of vendor/street food. Until I ate some hot and fresh and then all fears pretty much went out the window.
I think this is the kind of admission that may be most horrifying on Facebook, but I’ve never been into the Bachelor and didn’t like it when I DID see it. Even if I were into it, I wouldn’t be watching it because we don’t even have television stations coming into our unit… we’re solely a dvd-viewing family.
When we watch new movies they are either checked out from the library or freebies from RedBox. We watched a movie in the theater over Christmas and it was the first movie we’d seen in theater since our honeymoon 2 1/2 years ago. We don’t usually even know what’s in the theater…
I am a reader. I love to read, but when reading a book, I have the habit of taking a sneak peek of the ending. If the ending was either a. mind-numbingly predictable, or b. ridiculously stupid, I have been known to put the book down and never pick it back up.
February 9, 2010 at 10:31 am
living in zion
Wow! Guatemala. I was thinking more along the lines of Italy or Germany. Ya know, adventure with heat and air conditioner. Guatemala would be quite the culture shock. Now your old posts with concerns about the future make perfect sense.
Do you know how long you will be there? I guess if this is long-term you will be an expert tortilla maker. What will you teach to your RS sisters for Homemaking meeting? You know you will totally get tapped. If I was in charge I would get you called first thing, before Primary snapped you up.
I have the same outdoors love-it-in-theory-hate-it-in-real-life. We have a garage full of outdoorsy stuff. From looking, you would assume I am one hip enviro. girl. In reality, I don’t sleep a wink unless I am either home or in an expensive hotel with down comforters. I hate sweating and everything associated with effort. I only like hiking on flat ground and detest riding bikes. I am a big fat poser. But I do have the world cutest Eddie Bower hiking boots. I snagged them for $2.00 at a garage sale.
February 9, 2010 at 10:45 am
Tiffany Gee Lewis
Oh, true confessions are so much fun. I once took “The Economist” with me to read at my prenatal checkup because while I am a journalist who loves the news, it was a deliberate staging to show that even though I was having my fourth child, I was still an educated woman.
It go the desired result. When the doctor walked in he raised his eyebrows and asked, “Wow, are you reading that for a class or something?”
February 9, 2010 at 11:08 am
brohammas
Lying to a potential spouse about your interests is dangerous, inevitable, and the whole purpose of dating and long engagements. My fiance loved football and thought I was smart. My wife is the polar opposite of both.
One of the most liberating and pleasing things of a good marriage is letting yourinner and truest dorky self be exposed and subsequentially appreciated rather than shewed back into its hiding place.
And of course, confessing that you don’t really like cool things sets those up who really do like them, to sound pretentious if they speak up.
February 9, 2010 at 11:12 am
Hosander
!!!!!!! Thank you for clearing the air for the rest of us trying so hard to be cool. We can be the new cool.
February 9, 2010 at 11:19 am
nakiru
Tiffany, I laughed out loud at your comment. That’s EXACTLY the sort of thing I see myself doing in the future.
February 9, 2010 at 11:50 am
Traci
I just read Gone With the Wind and loved it more dearly than almost anything else. It was like Margaret Mitchell sat in on my parents marriage. It was important reading to me.
My daughter is named Margaret, a woman asked me about it the other day, I said “My very favorite character in my favorite book is Marguerite, if I could get away with calling her that, I would.”
“What is the book?” she asked.
” the Scarlet Pimpernel” I said proudly, thinking that was perfectly respectable reading.
“Oh, ” she laughed, then said in a conspiritory tone “don’t worry, I named my daughter after a character in the Thorn Birds.”
What!?! The Scarlet Pimpernel and the Thorn Birds are the same thing? Is it on par with Confessions of a Shopaholic? I thought I was pretty smart, and then it turns out I’m just too stupid to edit. Which would be a good name for my blog, come to think of it…
February 9, 2010 at 11:51 am
Traci
brohammas, you are hilarious. Amen brother.
February 9, 2010 at 12:06 pm
stannyann
I love you for every one of those reasons. Maybe more for them. In fact, other than subscribing to the New Yorker, we have every one of those things in common.
(you wanted to list that you don’t own boots or beautiful jeans didn’t you… DIDN’T YOU!?)
Also, very difficult to buy un-coolness when you/husband/wildly-beautiful-daughter are doing good in a 3rd world country. Just sayin…
February 9, 2010 at 12:12 pm
dalene
this is the best thing i have read on the web in some time and may, just may, keep me from breaking up with blogging completely.
thanks for keeping it real.
February 9, 2010 at 1:08 pm
Louise Plummer
We didn’t save.
February 9, 2010 at 1:17 pm
jane
Ha! I just cleaned out my boxes of books in the basement yesterday. All those classics from high school and college went to the DI. I just finally figured out I’m not going to ever read any of that stuff for fun, especially with a doped-out mommy of 3 kids 3 and under brain. I wish I was the kind of person who enjoyed being mentally stimulated like that, but for now what I really like is a light chick historical fiction. Oh well.
But I still love facebook. It’s the best for keeping in touch with friends and family, even if I don’t have particularly enlightening things to say!
February 9, 2010 at 1:37 pm
Mehrsa
This is why I love you. I know we have had this conversation many times before, but way to keep it real. I hope after the foreign service you are glad to come back home and that you have something negative to say about all the places you have lived.
February 9, 2010 at 2:25 pm
Nel
Who needs Facebook to measure your coolness when you write for the Apron Stage?
February 9, 2010 at 2:49 pm
Steph
I loved this post and the honesty. So much of the time we all do things because we think we should be doing them and not because we want to.
So, amen to everything you said.
February 9, 2010 at 2:56 pm
Kathryn
Ooooo… confession time. I feel that there is this tension between what I think I should be (or, more positively, what I want to be) and what I am. I’m beginning to give up those artificial notions that I must be something in particular and admitting, at least to myself, that I am what I am. And maybe someday, I’ll admit it all to the world.
But for now, here are the confessions I am willing to broadcast.
1- I’m a picky eater. I don’t want to be, but I am. There’s just no more denying it. If it’s slimey or sticky or smelly or squishy, I’d rather not see, touch nor eat it. Why bother when you could have an Oreo?
I hate to cook. I want to love it, I want to be that person that can magically conjure a four course meal out of nothing more than a zucchini and a rolling pin, but I’m not. Maybe it is my grandmother’s voice in my ear that drives me so hard in this direction, whispering that the only thing standing between me and Mr. Right is my inability to cook a pot roast, but I can’t convince myself to enjoy it. And at the end of it all, there’s a mess and a culinary creation that I really didn’t want in the first place.
Turns out, to echo Chantel’s words (at least I think they were her’s), I am not a foodie.
There is about a two degree temperature window in which I am comfortable. Anything outside of this I find unbearable and I am not above whining about it.
Here’s to fessing up to being who we really are, in all of our un-Facebook-able glory.
February 9, 2010 at 3:40 pm
Jason M
I like the honesty. I also like that you have a companion who encourages you to get out of your comfort zone now and then. At least you know you don’t like the outdoors because you’ve tried it. What if you’d been born in a family that taught you to hole-up with a pistol, waiting for doomsday? Where would you be right now without someone to encourage you into something new? In that hole with a big mac (lowered down to you in a bucket) and your 9mm Sig Sauer?
I’m practically autistic when it comes to some kinds of change or trying new things. I am glad I’ve had loved ones to hold my hand or cheer me on while something new is coming my way. Even if after it’s over, I decide I still like a big mac over creme brulee.
February 9, 2010 at 3:59 pm
Michaela
Traci, The Scarlet Pimpernel is NOT on par with Thorn Birds. My proof? I was a lit major, and have never heard of Thorn Birds, while The Scarlet Pimpernel is one of my favorite books. There you have it – it’s official. From a fine literature expert. Or at the very least, a pretentious lit fan. In the spirit of honesty, I DO love literature, but on the hard days, what really gets me through is a good dose of Harry Potter or a romance movie: British period romance a la Mansfield Park or North and South.
Good luck in Guatemala, Rebecca!
February 9, 2010 at 4:25 pm
angie
You have struck a chord with me! You know, sometimes I read this blog and get my panties in a wad because deep down I know I will never be as cosmopolitan and cool as you ladies. As soon as I saw the picture of you slinging your baby in front of foreign tapestries I thought, “Oh here we go with how exotic and well traveled un -average you all are)! I’ve never been to New York City. My mother brought me home from the hospital to an avocado green double-wide trailer. I’m 32 and just had my first fillet mignon last week. I’m just not super fancy. Sometimes I feel like this blog is for the traveled and the well read and people who wear pea coats while walking down busy streets who are annoyed with regular… well regular people. I truly couldn’t discern if you all were snobby or if I was just insecure. At any rate, I love this post. Thanks. I’ll keep reading because good writing and entertainment is for everyone. And this post made you seem like a real person (which I’m confident you were before you wrote this post.)
February 9, 2010 at 4:38 pm
sunny
This post, these confessions are one of the reasons I like you so much. Joyce probably wrote your second favorite book. Or at least you can talk with confidence about Joyce and Nabakov. And that one article you read from your New Yorker makes you think of a million other articles you read and that you can cross-reference in a split second. And even if you don’t like adventures I can’t wait to hear what you have to say about all of them, because no doubt it will be interesting, funny, and smart.
February 9, 2010 at 5:37 pm
Marilyn
Hooray for embracing the ordinary! I loved this post. There should be a word to describe this familiar how-to-present-myself-to-the-world feeling, somewhere in between “posturing” (much too negative) and :”putting my best foot forward” (too noble). Whatever you call it, I’ve spent way too much time doing it.
Ira Glass used a great phrase once on This American Life to describe what happens when educated people find themselves eagerly discussing subjects that they know only a small bit about as though they were experts. He called it “speaking Modern Jackass.”
And I’ll drop the pretense and admit that a large part of my motivation for that last paragraph, even more than the urge to publicly put myself in the NPR crowd, was to see if I could pull off the italics in the post. Thanks, nakiru.
February 9, 2010 at 6:30 pm
Traci
Thank you, Michaela. You know, that does make me feel better myslef.
February 9, 2010 at 6:30 pm
Traci
myself….nuts.
February 9, 2010 at 7:38 pm
sharry
and for all that…i love you all the more.
February 10, 2010 at 12:17 am
mary
haha, this totally made me laugh. Your candor is brilliant. I found you through Compulsive Writer, and I admire you in a BIG way for being brave enough to take a baby to Guatemala. My husband served his mission there (Quetzaltenango) and I spent 2 weeks with him there in our newlyweds phase. After one week of pinto beans on the side of my Mcdonald’s pancakes instead of hash browns, the hardest hotel beds I’ve ever even imagined and hotels that, like yours, boasted hot water (but did NOT deliver), I was SO ready to come home. Enough adventuring in a third world country!! I got over it, though, and we went to see Tikal (did you go to Tikal?? AMAZING), and in retrospect I completely think it was cool (retrospect is like that).
Anyhow…the one thing I really, really wish that I had asked an hermana how to do while I was there is how to make homemade corn tortillas! I’m OBSESSED with them, and so far my internet searches haven’t been all that successful in the reality of my kitchen. If you have a few minutes and the inclination, could you please share?? I would think you are the coolest person on the planet even though your favorite book is Gone With the Wind when CLEARLY the greatest book in the world is Twilight (KIDDING).
mari_contrary@hotmail.com. Thanks for keepin’ it real on this post!
mary
February 10, 2010 at 1:50 am
Michaela
My pleasure, Traci!
February 10, 2010 at 2:09 am
Kelly
Thank heaven for honest people. I needed a little honesty today, and humor, because I just got kicked in the teeth.
ps- under my bed are two storage boxes (the huge, under the bed ones) FULL of Regency Romance novels. I love them. They get me through the winter. I have read “Marian’s Christmas Wish 17 times because I love Marian, Lord Ingram is better than Mr Darcy, and on page 117 is the best kissing scene ever.
February 10, 2010 at 10:06 am
Nel
I know its a day late, but reading these comments reminds me of an experience I had in Guatemala that I had totally forgotten! I find it even funnier in light of everyone else’s experiences.
We chose a particular hotel in Peten not only on the basis of recommendation, but because it boasted a hot tub. We thought this would be a fantastic way to relax after a day of hiking to, in, and from ruins. Much to our chagrin, we went to hop in at the end of the day and it was ice cold. When we complained to the front desk, their solution was to turn on the jets. We wanted to be mad at them, but how could we?
February 10, 2010 at 12:44 pm
Elise
I read a comment the other day that basically addressed the idea that “change is almost never welcomed initially but often cherished later.”
February 10, 2010 at 1:42 pm
leah
this is just very funny and refreshingly honest. bravo! p.s. i lied about being a sports fan. and when my husband and i attend games, i always bring a book.
February 10, 2010 at 4:59 pm
AMG
I want to say that travel is wasted on people like you, but that’s not really how I feel. Only a little bit. And I’ll never forget reading Gone with the Wind and bawling my eyes out at the end, lying in mom and dads bed and calling you on the phone. I think it’s time I read that again.
February 11, 2010 at 1:40 am
Shauna
You seriously KILL me!! I truly think you are one of the funniest, cleverest (is that a word) person ever!! Okay, don’t let it get to your head. No really, I die reading your posts. I still can’t believe you’re in Guatemala- CRAZY!! Please tell me Miss Adelaide still has her fancy gold bracelet on as she bumps around in the back seat of your car as you cruise the streets of Guatemala- LOVE IT! Also, LOVE You’ve Got Mail. Let’s juts say I was a wee bit obsessed with Meg Ryan’s hair in that movie. I would bring the DVD case to my hairdresser trying to copy it. Ummm, not so much. Those were my very “special” years at BYU. No one told me straight brown hair can’t look like Meg’s short highlighted beautiful hair- whatever!
February 12, 2010 at 1:24 am
Cissy
What else can I possibly add? I kept nodding as I read your list, and then I nodded and agreed with a bunch of comments.
–I love the outdoors, but I don’t tackle it; I stroll through it.
–Even after being to gorgeous Denmark (my only trip outside N. America) I still dream mostly of trips throughout the USA. Is that un-cultured or what?
–I hated Catch in the Rye, too. I still haven’t revisited it.
–I just can’t see beauty in the majority of modern art. (More lack of culture)
–But I can hardly get enough of local museums.
–I passively boycott McDonald’s, but drive to Wendy’s for stress-busting chicken nuggets and a frostie.
Here’s to Apron Stage, a place where we (often) tell the truth about ourselves!
February 14, 2010 at 10:16 pm
Sierra
So tecnhically you and I are strangers but I have been reading the AS for about a year. And now, we have a few things in common. My parents took me to Guatemala, Senahux and Chireaj when I was 17 years old. (We went through an organization called CHOICE Humanitarian.) It changed my life. I still remember the smiles on the faces of the people when we tried to speak to them. Memories of that trip still motivate me today, as I stay up way too late studying for my medical school classes knowing I’ll be getting up much too early when my daughter decides she is hungry.
Amazing experience aside, I was SO excited to find a Burger King when we got back to Guatemala City. There is a reason I was not a pioneer. I can only handle roughing-it for so long.
This past August my husband and I took our then 6 month old to Peru. We really enjoyed traveling with her. Now, I never grumble under my breath about clipping her into her carseat.
Safe travels!