Comments on: I found the picture on the internet. I thought the satin was a nice touch.

By: In Which That Wife Reveals Her Deepest Desire « That Wife

In Which That Wife Reveals Her Deepest Desire « That Wife — Tue, 20 Jan 2009 06:00:37 +0000

[...] leave the talk of should we/shouldn’t we to the couple. Let’s stop asking if people are “trying”. You tell me that instead of desiring a child I should be exploring other areas of my life, so ask [...]

By: rubyeliot

rubyeliot — Fri, 09 Jan 2009 12:20:14 +0000

this post had me laughing out loud. thanks for your joyous wit! my sister recently got pregnant after a long long expensive time of trying. it was sort of a miracle. i’ve never prayed so hard for a group of cells to attach to a uterine wall before ever. ever.

thank you. for this post.

By: Elizabeth

Elizabeth — Fri, 09 Jan 2009 04:00:33 +0000

Imagine being at the extended family Christmas party when my offendingly blunt cousin shouts across the room, “Liz, are you guys trying?” The whole family turned to see the mortified look on my face.

Our monthly “trying” days were so long ago, but I remember them vividly. No fun. Now we scrounge up $15,000, fast, pray, hope the stars align, the heavens smile upon us, put my body through the ringer, and just maybe we’ll get a child. It’s the hardest thing we’ve been through, and yet we wouldn’t give it up for anything.

It’s no fun, but hang in there.

By: Kristie

Kristie — Fri, 09 Jan 2009 00:32:17 +0000

and why does, in a man’s head, “trying” mean 24/7.

I hope peeing on a stick brings you good news soon.

By: Missy

Missy — Thu, 08 Jan 2009 23:45:11 +0000

Seriously. Could anything be worse than hoping for a pregnancy only to be greeted by “the period”?

So been there Rebecca. Mehrsa is right though, it made my Avery (after a miscarriage and a year of said ‘trying’) worth it despite the never-ending crying for a good three months of colic.

By: Sarah

Sarah — Thu, 08 Jan 2009 19:32:27 +0000

Laura, love you and your flip-flops. You trying to kick them meanly in someone’s face is a good image.

Rebecca, love you and your womb. Can I say that?

By: Mary Ann McConkie

Mary Ann McConkie — Thu, 08 Jan 2009 06:42:18 +0000

Thank heavens for the chance to “try” again. Good things around the corner……my dear. Love, Mom

By: Louise Plummer

Louise Plummer — Thu, 08 Jan 2009 05:35:10 +0000

“Trying” is only the first stage, as I recall. The second stage is the infertitlity workup: taking your temperature to see when you ovulate, having your fallopian tubes blown out while you’re hanging from a meat hook with your fanny in the air. There’s the operation to clear your womb of endometriosis. Then there’s clomophene and other miracle drugs: “Maybe you’ll have twins!” Every month is a trip to the insane asylum. There are, I realize, advantages to being a woman of a certain age. My last period was during the first Bush administration.

By: heathermommy

heathermommy — Wed, 07 Jan 2009 23:40:24 +0000

“trying” takes al the fun out of “it” . If you catch my drift. We have been “trying” for 7 months and before that we had 3 miscarriages. Not fun. Part of me wants to just get pregnant so I can start enjoying “it” again.

I really do feel for you. The negative preganacy test is such a sad thing. I usually end up depressed for a few days and drown my sorrows in a bag of peanut m&ms.

Hopefully it doesn’t take too long for you guys. But as you know 1 month seems like an eternity when you are “trying”

By: Laura

Laura — Wed, 07 Jan 2009 22:23:22 +0000

We started “trying” for child #2 when our son Jacob was 2 years old. Our second child, Sam, was born when Jacob was over 4 years old. Every month (all 14 of them), the 2 week wait was miserable, and every month I was convinced it hadn’t worked and my husband was convinced it had. It also seemed that everyone around me was pregnant, and I wasn’t.

If I heard the words”just relax and it will happen” one more time, I might have thrown my shoes. Fortunately I live in TX and only wear flip flops, but still. I felt that the negative pregnancy test mocked me every month, and no one could quite understand how hard it was to not be pregnant.

Mehrsa, I love your comment. That patience and love has come in handy when Sam gets sick in the middle of the night, or when he thinks that talking loudly is an acceptable form of communication at 3 am.

Thanks, Rebecca, for this post.